Thinking about the Ocean

Over the summer, I visited my sister in Vancouver (something I do every year, but since she had visited Regina in June it wasn't expected) and branched out a bit my spending four days in Victoria on my own. It was my first time travelling alone (without immediately meeting up with someone I knew at my destination) and my first time staying in a hostel. It was a little scary, a lot exciting, and unbelievably beautiful. I feel a bit silly for my earnestness, but this small trip was significant in a lot of ways, and I couldn't help but have high expectations. A lot of the significance is quite personal, but part worth sharing: living in the prairies can feel incredibly isolating - it's nice to escape and see the ocean, as well as remind myself that non-prairie cities are not sparkly queer meccas. I like to leave the prairies to prove that I am, in fact, able to leave, and that I just don't really want to.

Travelling alone meant I only had to do things I really wanted to I found that very lovely. I spent most of my time wandering, writing, looking at the ocean in awe, taking photos, pressing flowers, collecting shells, drinking fancy coffee & iced teas, and generally enjoying my own company and my surrounding. Other nice things included coffee from a high school acquaintance, visiting the Craigdarroch Castle (super weird but super beautiful and my mom taught at the Victoria Conservatory of Music when it was still housed in the castle so I wanted to see it), and meeting, though briefly, Jessica Luxury of Tangled Up In Lace. I also bumped in to her partner, Fleetwood, the evening prior & felt like an awkward teenager introducing myself with a "I recognize you from the internet" but I probably would've felt more awkward if I failed to say hello. They're such rad people, I hope I have the opportunity to hang out with them more in the future!

I also really loved being able to hang out with my sister, her partner, and their friends in Vancouver. I feel really lucky that my sister and I get along so well - she is definitely one of my favourite people to talk to/spend time with & we hold a lot of similar beliefs. While in Vancouver, along with a lot of walking, good food, and even better conversation, I also competed at the Vancouver Poetry Slam (I'll share a video soon!) and went to my first ever Dyke March. None of these things were without problem, but they were ultimately enjoyable and I was glad to experience them without panic.

Something about sharing photos from months ago online seems almost redundant (I'm so used to sharing things as they happen via instagram and twitter & I think most of us are used to receiving information that way too) but I wasn't able to totally reflect on that trip until now. Victoria was the climactic point of a rather tumultuous relationship, and thinking too hard about the ocean air left my chest tight & heart broken, but after the usual end-of-relationship processing I'm grateful to have had closure and be free of an emotionally unhealthy relationship. And, as the weather starts to cool and I prepare for another winter in the prairies, I've enjoyed looking through these photos again.

So. Beautiful.

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